HTWFAIP: Don’t Criticize, Condemn, or Complain

In a previous post I listed Dale Carnegie’s 3 fundamental techniques for handling people from his 1936 bestseller How to Win Friends & Influence People.

Lets take a closer look at number one.

1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain

Criticism is ineffective because it puts people on the defensive and leads them to try to justify themselves instead of making the change that you desire. Criticism injures a person’s pride, damages their sense of importance, breeds resentment, and reduces morale. This is not an environment conducive to positive change. One of the many famous anecdotes sprinkled throughout the book appears in this chapter, and sums it up nicely: “If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive”.